I am fortunate to have a huge green area behind the house I live in. Sometimes, there’ll be even sheep grazing, natural lawn mowers, if you wanna call it that.
Recently, as in a couple of weeks ago, I had come across a major trigger somewhere (UGH!), and I spent the upcoming two days or so in some kind of haze. Everything around me felt like I was kinda wrapped in some kind of cotton or somesuch. I sensed that I was about to spiral …and I clearly didn’t want let alone needed that.
The first option I went for was grabbing my journal, my two small boxes of stickers, pens and plonked down on a concrete bench outside to simply write down my thoughts. While I was sitting outside in the sun, ranting and venting on paper (yes, at times I am still old-fashioned, but I firmly believe that blog/s should not be my only archive, iykwim), I also felt the tension ease bit by bit. That got me thinking …
…and sure enough, I made use of it. After all, the weather was absolutely gorgeous in the past couple of weeks, so I’d grab a huge blanket, a book, a waterbottle, my backpack and went outside to a different bench. Made myself comfy there with the blanket, opened the respective book and simply lost myself in the pages.
While there is some noise (kindergarden nearby, passers-by, often with their doggos, and that kinda thing) it’s more the kind of background noise you can easily adapt to. My phone stayed in my backpack most of the time, and what can I say? It was the best idea I’ve had in a while, fam.
Over here, some supermarkets offer a so-called “silent hour” for people who have autism, or are neurodivergent in one way or another. They’ll dim the lights, reduce the noise as much as possible, and thereby help autistics / neurodivergent people to go grocery shopping without overstimulation and sensory overload.
Which is what I decided to call my little time-outs outside – my very own Silent Hour. I kept the influx of any sensory distraction at the bare minimum and realized that this was exactly – and I mean EXACTLY – what I needed. The world is such a scary, dark place, you’re constantly bombarded (pun not intended) with an influx of news and yadda yadda, so I decided to dedicate an hour or two to my self, my (mental) well-being.
Sure, at times, I also will chat with people who pass me by, or join me on the bench, but that is perfectly okay. The goal is to calm the fuck down, ease my mind, and find some peace and quiet in every day situations. And that is what I did. Time slows down, and yet also flew by because for once, I didn’t check my phone all the time and was surprised that like, almost an hour had passed already. I found some “inner balance”, in a way.
Sitting there on “my” bench, reading a book has become some kind of sanctuary. It’s another skill I added to my portfolio.
As I was spending some hours there, I realized more and more how freakishly GOOD it felt to have found this option. To have found something else that can help me …heal.
So who knows – maybe I finally AM in my Healing Era?
Time will tell. But for now, I shall embrace the little time-outs behind my house, weather permitting, of course. It is definitely wholesome, though!
*****
pic: mine
Ocean Soul 